Acceptance

We often desire acceptance from others. We are insecure about ourself and need confirmation from other people. We want to know what others might think about us. To be more specific, we are looking for acceptance from others by pondering what others may think about us. In most of the cases, the truth is that others are not thinking about us at all. Why is it so hard to rely on ourself? Why do we continuously worry about how we are perceived by others?

Going after illusions is difficult. Attempting to please others by finding out what they might like or think is just as hard. Our society is full of images and "role models" that describe and broadcast how we should be and what is "in" at the moment. The media carefully follows the young, beautiful, and rich and reports on their every move. People consume these illusions in great numbers. Everybody wants to get his or her share of the "better" life. We want to be associated with and be part of the success—or the illusion—of the greater life. Still, the happiest people are those who find their own way and follow their unique vision. These are the people who set new rules and break the old habits. They create something that has not been done before. They are not afraid to stick out from the crowd.

Following our instinct and finding the inner self is not easy. Since our childhood, we have been raised in the middle of different paradigms, customs, habits, and social expectations. We are expected to behave a certain way and become just like the other people (e.g., successful, famous, etc.). It is hard to realize what it is to be ourself and what we personally want and believe in. René Descartes, one of the most famous Western philosophers, did not accept anything per se. He reconstructed his own perception and understanding of his existence from real metaphysical fact—he might have doubted everything else, but he could not doubt that he existed. From this basis, Descartes started to build his own view of the world, and he only accepted things that he could rationally accept and prove by his own methodology and thinking.

Most of us may not want to be as thorough as Descartes was, but still it is worthwhile to consider and question things around us. Why is a good question to ask for almost everything we do. Often we take things for granted and accept everything at face value. As a result, we have year after year pored over someone else's thoughts and ideas, and we are filled with those; we cannot distinguish ourselves from other people's expectations and points of view. Standing on our own feet and being able to know and live in a way that we really feel is the right way is a wonderful thing. When we get the right choices and answers from within, there is no need to look for acceptance from the outside. It is enough to be satisfied by ourself. Doing the right thing from our own point of view is enough. We can do nothing more than our best in all circumstances. And it is enough, provided that we are honest with ourselves. It does not matter how the others perceive or think about us anymore.

When we start to know ourself, we start to appreciate more of our own actions and life. We are thus happier and can also share the happiness together with other people in our lives. Accepting ourselves and being content with our own lives are the first and the most important steps in our existence. We have to take the first step and do the hard work, but then we can also enjoy the rewards, like Descartes in the seventeenth century.